From the Desk of Jay Rainey – September 23, 2022

The following letter is adapted from remarks delivered at the all-school pep rally on Friday, September 23.

What a marvelous day it is to be a Ram! Here you are, full of excitement and energy for our Homecoming weekend, 1,250 students strong. The oldest of you turned eighteen way back in January, the youngest of you only turned four in July, and yet all of you are gathered here together, one mighty herd. There are precious few communities in the world like this joyful one to which we all belong. How lucky we are to be part of MICDS.

Have you ever wondered why rams are called rams, by the way? I used to wonder about that myself, so I asked one…and then it hit me. 🙄 Well, if you think that joke was terrible, then you are really going to be impressed by the winners of our MICDS Homecoming Bad Joke Contest. I received over 150 submissions this week from students, teachers, and staff, and because there were so many to consider, I randomly selected over 40 of my colleagues across the school to help judge which jokes were the best. The votes are in, so without further ado, and without pulling the wool over your eyes 🙄, I will now share which Rams charged to the top of the rankings in our contest.

First, an honorable mention joke from an anonymous internationally-minded ninth-grade student, which scored just shy of the top ten:

Q: What is your favorite thing about Sweden?
A: I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.

Coming in at number ten, Emma in sixth grade offers this entry that refuses to be left behind:

Q: Where do animals go if their tail falls off?
A: The re-tail store.

Ranking ninth in our contest is this ear-resistible submission by Alex in tenth grade:

Q: What do you call a row of rabbits hopping away?
A: A receding hare line.

Tied for seventh place, we have this joke from Ms. Williamson in the Upper School that’s really on the nose:

Q: What did the left eye say to the right eye?
A: Between you and me, something smells.

Also tied for seventh is this egg-straordinarily funny entry from Emily in eighth grade:

Q: What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
A: A chicken tender!

Now for our top five finishers. In fifth place, we have yet another tie. I hope you will enjoy this delicious submission from Alex in second grade:

Q: What candy do you eat on the playground?
A: Recess Pieces!

Also tied for fifth place is this bit of humor floated by Michael in eighth grade:

Q: I dreamed I was swimming in an ocean of orange soda.
A: But it was just a Fanta sea.

In fourth place, we have this breezy submission by an anonymous eleventh-grade student:

Q: Why do windmills like loud music?
A: They’re big heavy metal fans.

Coming in at number three is this joke by Ms. McGaughey in the Lower and Middle School that really explores the depths of comedy:

Q: Why did the man fall into the well?
A: Because he couldn’t see that well.

In second place, Sireen in seventh grade offers some life sciences humor that really cells itself 🙄:

Q: Did you read the section of the biology textbook about angry male sheep?
A: It was on a ram page!

And finally, it’s no accident that this joke from Tanay in eleventh grade earned first place:

Q: I wrote a book on how to fall down stairs.
A: It’s a step-by-step guide.

Thanks to everyone who participated in this week’s contest. Deciding on the best ones was no laughing matter. 🙄 There is one final joke that I will share with you before I turn things back over to Ashley and Winston. It was submitted by Jada in eleventh grade, and it goes like this:

Q: Did you hear the joke about the number of times the Rams have dominated at Homecoming?
A: Never mind. It’s too long!

Happy Homecoming weekend to you all! Go Rams! Beat the Bombers!

Jay Rainey
Head of School

This week’s addition to the Refrains for Rams playlist: Unconditional I (Lookout Kid) by Arcade Fire (Apple Music / Spotify)